I Scorn Cell-Phoning Drivers.

When I see some guy driving his automobile and talking on his cell phone I think he’s some kind of little girl. And when I see a woman doing it I think she’s two little girls. Anyone can talk on a cell phone and drive.

For real kicks try Dixie Cup© car-phoning. Me and some of the Lukes like to get on a highway and see how long we can keep up a four-way Dixie Cup link-up. Our record is 118 minutes. The challenge lies in keeping the string taut. Some Cuppers think the Forward Chevron — that’s the two center cars in the lead — is the best formation for maintaining tautness. Others swear by the Reverse Chevron. Both techniques have merit. But me and the Lukes like to position each car about half a length behind and on the right. We call it “The Wedge.” It’s elegant. Especially at night with only brake lights. Lost a lot of Lukes perfecting it.